okay pat passed out under dana's car
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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