we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize