So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
