If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
