So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize