i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize