I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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