I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
