happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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