me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
