Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
