I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
These tits shall not be calmed
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
