I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
