This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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