do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
