My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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