I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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