I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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