I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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