We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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