ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
