I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
