I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
My vagina is very pro this idea
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
