I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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