That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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