I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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