no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
