my room smells like sperm. sweet.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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