a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
