She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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