If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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