Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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