There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
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