You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Drake has all the answers
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
