Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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