After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
