Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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