you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
