I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
