i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize