Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize