Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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