I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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