hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
