Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
