i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize