honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
