Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize