thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
