I hope mine doesn't look like that
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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