Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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