check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize